“Bless (affectionately, gratefully praise) the Lord, O my soul; and all that is [deepest] within me, bless His holy name! Bless (affectionately, gratefully praise) the Lord, O my soul, and forget not [one of] all His benefits—Who forgives [every one of] all your iniquities, Who heals [each one of] all your diseases, Who redeems your life from the pit and corruption, Who beautifies, dignifies, and crowns you with loving-kindness and tender mercy; Who satisfies your mouth [your necessity and desire at your personal age and situation] with good so that your youth, renewed, is like the eagle’s [strong, overcoming, soaring]!”
Paul “Divorce isn’t always the option that people think it is.”
Sarah “So I’m just suppose to stay in a miserable marriage?”
Paul “Marriage is a loyal partnership. Do you really think God would leave you with just two options? Misery or divorce? That’s a myth.”
Sarah “Well, children deserve to live in a home where their parents aren’t fighting all the time.”
Paul “Children deserve to live in a home where the parents learn to NOT fight with each other,…Sarah, you can get a divorce. That is an option that is certainly available to you, but you owe it to yourself and to your children to be honest about why you’re doing it.”
~~~~~~
Brent “Paul, why is this so hard?”
Paul “Well, did you think that turning your world upside down would be easy?”
Brent “Tons of people get divorced every day.”
Paul “That’s the point. None of this is gonna be easy. I mean, nobody wins in a divorce except the attorneys.”
Brent “This is tearing us apart.”
Paul “Well, that’s exactly what is supposed to be happening. Look, God develops this redemptive plan for the world, and divorce just tears at the heart of it.”
~~~~~~
Sarah “I felt so alone.”
Donovan “And you thought by divorcing your husband, that’s gonna make you feel less alone?”
Sarah “No, I just wanted Brent to prioritize our marriage and make me feel important as much as the kids and his job.”
Donovan ” And you thought by nagging him, by blaming him, by withholding your love and support for him…”
Sarah “I just wanted him to…”
Donavan “To what?”
Brent “To stand up. She just wanted me to stand up for us…Your honor, I thought the value of a man was measured by how hard he worked and how quickly he climbed the ladder of success. What’s funny is as soon as I got kicked off that ladder of success, the only thing I could think about was…my wife and kids.”
~~~~~~
“You should defend those who cannot help themselves.”
“Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct. Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear—but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening.
Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.”
~~~1 Peter 3:1-7 (ESV)~~~
“Redemption means I’m doing the right thing for you when you’re doing the wrong thing for me,…Jesus paid a price for us that we could not pay,…” Jimmy Evans.
“…our first response always is anger,…frustrated,…the pity stuff,…I look at what God went through just to redeem me,…I mean I should at least give that to you,…You blamed me for everything. You would never take responsibility,…there’s two sides to every marriage,…You definitely have issues as much as your husband does, but what I did is I asked the Lord to change me,…and then I just started praying,…constantly in my prayer closet.,…I didn’t lose faith that God could change both of us,…” Karen Evans.
“In the end of the sabbath, as it began to dawn toward the first day of the week, came Mary Magdalene and the other Mary to see the sepulchre. And, behold, there was a great earthquake: for the angel of the Lord descended from heaven, and came and rolled back the stone from the door, and sat upon it. His countenance was like lightning, and his raiment white as snow: And for fear of him the keepers did shake, and became as dead men. And the angel answered and said unto the women, Fear not ye: for I know that ye seek Jesus, which was crucified. He is not here: for he is risen, as he said. Come, see the place where the Lord lay.”
“The wicked flee when no one pursues, but the righteous are bold as a lion.”
~~~Proverbs 28:1 (ESV)~~~
WHY?
“For consider your calling, brothers: not many of you were wise according to worldly standards, not many were powerful, not many were of noble birth. But God chose what is foolish in the world to shame the wise; God chose what is weak in the world to shame the strong; God chose what is low and despised in the world, even things that are not, to bring to nothing things that are, so that no human being might boast in the presence of God. And because of him you are in Christ Jesus, who became to us wisdom from God, righteousness and sanctification and redemption, so that, as it is written, “Let the one who boasts, boast in the Lord.”
We each have a story to tell. Retelling our own story offers others hope as it gently reminds us of not just how far we’ve come, but of the grace of God for His gentle and continued guidance throughout our journey. And, as is often the case, our story is not just about us and us alone.
“From Pain to Paradise: The Story of How God Transformed My Life & Marriage from Brokenness to Blessing ” is Karen Evans’ story of healing, not just of her own identity but that of her marriage as well. Falling in love with the man of her dreams also meant she would be taking on his own well hidden identity issues. And so throughout her retelling, she weaves aspects of her husband’s own story of healing.
This is not a revengeful tell-all, but a story of redemption. And while Karen Evans spent time being very frustrated and angry she also knew just how deeply she loved her husband. But to love her husband as she desired, she would learn not only to first love God, but of His love for her.
I enjoy reading another person’s story of healing especially when it is told with complete transparency. Karen Evans does just this ever so naturally and honestly. It is not told from the perspective of a bitter wife as she intentionally exposes all her husband’s deep and dark secrets, but as a wife who dearly loves her husband.
While Karen doesn’t directly offer a list of do’s and don’t for a closer relationship with ones spouse, she so expertly offers wisdom applicable to any marriage. Her story is told from the perspective of a Christian woman who desires to find her true value in her relationship with God as she realizes this is also the key to her identity and marriage.
Karen has been married to Jimmy Evans for well over forty years. Together they are the founders of Marriage Today Ministries, where they not only offer help for marriages, but candidly share their struggles within their own marriage.
Photo Credit: Lisa Fotios
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